【十招让你远离写作累赘】远离财务危机写作

　　累赘是英语写作中常见的弊病之一。改掉这个坏习惯，我们可以遵循一个宗旨：不要转弯抹角（don’t waste words），而应简明扼要（get to the point）。检查和修改文章时，我们应该去掉意思含糊不清、重复或夸张的词语。换句话说，就是除去没有用的东西，做到准确扼要。
　　1. 减少从句。校对时，尽量将长的从句改成短一点的短语。如：
　　Wordy[冗长的，啰嗦的]: The clown who was in the center ring was riding a tricycle.
　　Revised[修改]: The clown in the center ring was riding a tricycle.（处在中心圈的那个小丑骑着一辆三轮车。）
　　Wordy: The clown at the end of the line tried to steal everyone’s attention.
　　Revised: The last clown tried to steal everyone’s attention.（队伍最后的那个小丑想让所有人都注意到他。）
　　3. 避免用there is、there are和there were做句子开头。如果there is、there are和
　　there were对句子没有实际意思，请避免使用这类开头。如：
　　Wordy: There is a prize in every box of Quaker cereal.
　　Revised: A prize is in every box of Quaker cereal.（每盒桂格麦片里都有一个奖品。）Wordy: There are two security guards at the gate.
　　Revised: Two security guards stand at the gate.（门口站着两个警卫。）
　　4. 不要滥用修饰语。不要使用对表达句子意思作用不大的修饰语（如very、really、totally等）。如：
　　Wordy: By the time she got home, Mary was very tired.
　　Revised: By the time she got home, Mary was exhausted.（回到家时，玛丽已经精疲力竭。）
　　Wordy: She was also really hungry.
　　Revised: She was also hungry/famished[极饥饿的].（她也很饿。）
　　5. 避免累赘。用简明扼要的词语代替累赘、词不达意的表达方式。记住：不必要的词对我们要表达的意思没有任何作用（或只有些微影响），它们只会令读者厌烦，分散其注意力，所以去掉它们吧！
　　Wordy: At this point in time, we should edit our work.
　　Revised: Now we should edit our work.（我们现在应该修订作品了。）
　　6. 使用主动动词。可以的话，请让句子的主语做些事情吧。如：
　　Wordy: The grant[津贴] proposals[提案] were reviewed by the students.
　　Revised: The students reviewed the grant proposals.（学生们对津贴提案进行了评论。）
　　7. 不要炫耀。达·芬奇说过：“至繁归于至简（Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication）。”不要以为复杂的单词或长长的短语会给读者留下深刻印象，其实最简单的词往往是最佳选择。如：Wordy: At this moment in time, students who are matriculating[被录取入学] through high school should be empowered to participate[参加] in the voting process.
　　Revised: High school students should have the right to vote.（高中生应该有投票权。）
　　Wordy: All things being equal, what I am trying to say is that in my opinion all students should, in the final analysis, have the right to vote for all intents and purposes.
　　Revised: Students should have the right to vote.（高中生应该有投票权。）
　　9. 避免使用动词的名词形式。过度名词化不是好事，我们的建议很简单：给动词一个机会。如：
　　Wordy: The presentation of the arguments by the students was convincing.
　　Revised: The students presented their arguments convincingly./The students argued convincingly.（学生们对其论点的阐述很有说服力。）
　　situation、something、thing、type、way等意思含糊的名词可用具体一点的词代替，或者直接去掉它们。如：
　　Wordy: After reading several things in the area of psychology[心理学]-type subjects, I decided to put myself in a situation where I might change my major.
　　Revised: After reading several psychology books, I decided to change my major.（读完几本心理学的书后，我决定改变自己的专业。）